If you are a parent who is going through a difficult time in your relationship with your Childs, you might feel frustrated, hurt, or hopeless. You might wonder what you did wrong, or how you can fix things. You might feel like you are losing your child, or that they don’t care about you anymore.
I want to tell you that you are not alone. Many parents face similar challenges with their young adult children, especially in this fast-changing and uncertain world. It is normal to have conflicts, misunderstandings, and disagreements. It is also normal to feel a range of emotions, from anger to sadness to guilt.
But it is also possible to heal your relationship, or at least improve it. It might not happen overnight, or in the way you expect, but it can happen. The first step is to acknowledge your feelings and accept them as valid. You don’t have to suppress them or judge them. You just have to let them be.
The second step is to try to understand your child’s perspective. They are not trying to hurt you or rebel against you. They are trying to find their own identity, their own path, their own voice. They are facing their own challenges, fears, and doubts. They might not know how to express themselves, or how to cope with their emotions. They might need your support, but not your control.
The third step is to communicate with your child in a respectful and compassionate way. You don’t have to agree with everything they say or do, but you have to listen to them and acknowledge their feelings. You have to avoid criticizing, blaming, or lecturing them. You have to express your own feelings and needs in a calm and clear way. You have to set healthy boundaries and respect theirs.
The fourth step is to seek help if you need it. You don’t have to do this alone. You can reach out to other parents who are going through the same thing, or join a support group online or offline. You can also talk to a professional counselor or therapist who can help you deal with your emotions and find effective ways to communicate with your child.
Remember that you are not a bad parent, and your child is not a bad person. You are both human beings who love each other, but sometimes struggle to show it. You can overcome this challenge and grow together as a family. You just have to be patient, open-minded, and willing to change.
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